just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
In other news, I just burned my penis
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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