the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
