Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.