According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
We left the knife in your bed.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Randomize
