I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
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