It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
40s are totally the cure
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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