I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
