Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
