Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Randomize
