you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
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