1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
