Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
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