3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
