dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Say something about gay babies.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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