Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

dats a huuuuuge bitch!

(773): View more from Illinois

who is this????

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(905): View more from Toronto

Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..

(1-905): View more from Toronto

With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.

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(816): View more from Missouri

Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.

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(954): View more from Florida

Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.

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(704): View more from North Carolina

You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...

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(571): View more from Virginia

It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack

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(845): View more from New York

"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.

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(410): View more from Maryland

So I just went to clothing optional bar

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".

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