i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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