and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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