And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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