on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
