no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I wish there were birth control emojis
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
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