There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
two words...techno handjob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
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