So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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