Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Randomize
