My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
