He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
