How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
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