I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Randomize