big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
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