is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
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