It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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