we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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