So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
Randomize