her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
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