did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
