I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Randomize
