I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
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