he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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