Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Randomize
