just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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