I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
