Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
