Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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