Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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