"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
