turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
