party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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