So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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