She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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