If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
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