I swear she didn't look like that last week.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
