Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
